Soup. Tears. Tea. Gee. Me.

tea cosy by pip Lincolne

You’re only as happy as your unhappiest child.

Is that how the saying goes? I suppose it would be easy to assume that this mostly applies to toddlers who have unacceptable bumps in theirs socks or pre-schoolers who absolutely MUST have a bowl of ice cream as big as their head, but that’s just not the case. Even when your kids are grown-up (if that is even a thing) or nearly grown-up, the adage rings true.

My kids are grown-up and nearly grown-up (with grown-up being a thing with them, from what I can see), but when they are not okay, it still weighs heavily… on me. It’s kind of like being a bit submerged as you go about your day. Some of the time you’re used to it and are managing okay – but are definitely feeling out of your depth. Other times the day feel so heavy you have to push through with all your might.

One kid is recovering from a painful operation. One kid is recovering from a painful experience. One kid has a painful cough but is actually okay in all other regards. It’s hard to make out who’s the least happy, but it’s good to note there are peaks and troughs in the general landscape of kid feelings… So there’s that.

The first kid is coming around for doses of chicken soup, couch time, cooking shows on telly and cups of tea. The second kid is texting for comfort food recipes and sending snaps of the resulting delicious meals. The last kid (actually lives here and) is lapping the kitchen looking for just the right thing to raise their spirits, through bleary eyes and rattly chest.

Wah.

I hope everyone is on the mend super soon, but these things take their own time, don’t they?

It’s such a helpless feeling when you can’t fix things for your people, isn’t it? And don’t you just wish that you could go through the tough bits for them? The rules are… YOU CAN’T!

Love to you peaches. I am hoping that your people are okay! Onward!

pip signature

 

Things I’m doing (when I’m not mildly freaking out on behalf of my kids)

Looking after an adorable cat while her parents are in Japan.
Watching Outlander. It’s the best.
Making chilli sauce! YUM!
Trying to sleep (it’s not working very well…) #HelloSleepDebt
Making cute crocheted squares (I will show you v soon, in case you fancy seeing!)
Seeing a few lovely friends
Reading The Crafty Gentleman

7 Comments

  1. ‘You are only as happy as your unhappiest child’ – a frightening concept when you have a 14 year old doing battle with all the female hormones while being convinced that she is a he. What a minefield! My heart breaks on a nearly daily basis and just when I think we can muddle along ok, something else comes along. The next few years aren’t going to be boring! And there are bound to be moments of happiness along the way, I will be keeping those close to my heart, thanks for putting voice to those moments when you can doing nothing but hold a hand, x

  2. yes this parenting lark is bloody hard stuff , with good bits too , like a mr 5 who insists he is laying eggs and starting a family . He worked out he could buy two kinder surprises himself with his pocket money yesterday , he was so smiley about it. Oh he doesn’t want them for the chocolate (he’s lactose intolerant) ,or the toy he gives them to his friend Alex (at kindy) no he wants the egg so he can have more children. He firmly believes he will have a baby one day which will grow in his tummy .

  3. Ouch, this one went right to the feels! I have only one kid and he’s still very little indeed, but I’ve always suspected that all the worrying I do on his behalf isn’t just for the short-term. My mum always says “small people, small worries, big people, big worries”… But then she also says not only “onward!”, but also “upward!”. She probably has the right idea. Until then, I hope the chicken soup helps.

  4. Your description of that feeling you get when life is difficult for your adult children is so spot on….it really resonated with me. I love the way you capture the emotions of being a mother regardless of your child’s age.

  5. I hope this week is brighter for you and your loves! It’s easy to forget you can’t fix everything …sometimes your brain tells you you can! You’re right. You can’t. But just being there for them makes them pretty lucky 🙂
    PS. Outlander is pretty exceptional escapism! I caught up last night but now I have to wait another whole week!

  6. Onward Pip…one of my fave sayings. My children are younger than your young adults but yes, I often wish I could just fix things for them. When things get rough at school I just want to take them to a cafe for a hot chocolate and whisk them away from that unforgiving school yard. But, this is one of life’s lessons I guess. Wishing you a happy week ahead x

  7. I had an older and wiser colleague, who had raised all his children to adulthood and had lovely grandchildren that there is never any way to recover sleep debt. It stayed with me and sleep is an important part of my day. I don’t sacrifice it for very much at all.

    Oh, I do hope the children’s bad things turn good again soon. I so know how it feels to be helpless to really do much more than provide a safe place, a stocked kitchen and an internet connection.

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